Another week of well, you know . . .
#32 Buffalo Bills (2-7-0, -145, LW: 32)
#31 Oakland Raiders (1-7-0, -111, LW: 29)
The Raiders have mailed in this season and are banking on the next couple of drafts to make them competitive when they resurface in Vegas. They have a lot of picks, but the bigger question is this: Are they really counting on Jon Gruden to make the right decisions and coach them up? Forget about this being his first season at the helm in 10 years. Since winning the Super Bowl in his first season in Tampa he was 45-51 the last six seasons with two wild-card round exits. And besides his absurd ESPN show, what evidence did he have to prove he could handle an offense? Here are Tampa’s rankings in points during his tenure:
2002: 18
2003: 18
2004: 23
2005: 20
2006: 31
2007: 18
2008: 19
And yes, he had a nice run with the Raiders before going to Tampa, but their best ranking was his first year in Tampa. I’m not counting on it.
#30 Arizona Cardinals (2-6-0, -89, LW: 31)
#29 New York Giants (1-7-0, -55, LW: 28)
#28 Tampa Bay Buccaneers (3-5-0, -46, LW: 26)
#27 San Francisco 49ers (2-7-0, -32, LW: 30)
#26 Jacksonville Jaguars (3-5-0, -36, LW: 27)
#25 New York Jets (3-6-0, -15, LW: 19)
#24 Detroit Lions (3-5-0, -30, LW: 22)
#23 Cleveland Browns (2-6-1, -57, LW: 25)
#22 Denver Broncos (3-6-0, -8, LW: 20)
#21 Dallas Cowboys (3-5-0, +3, LW: 17)
#20 Green Bay Packers (3-4-1, -12, LW: 16)
#19 Tennessee Titans (4-4-0, -7, LW: 24)
#18 Miami Dolphins (5-4-0, -38, LW: 23)
#17 Cincinnati Bengals (5-3-0, -16, LW: 18)
#16 Atlanta Falcons (4-4-0, +2, LW: 21)
#15 Indianapolis Colts (3-5-0, +18, LW: 15)
#14 Philadelphia Eagles (4-4-0, +22, LW: 14)
#13 Washington Redskins (5-3-0, -12, LW: 9)
One of the funniest Onion articles ever was when Plain White Paper announced Alex Smith as their spokesman. And he’s just that. Plain. He won’t amaze. He won’t impress. He won’t disappoint. He’s just there to not screw up. If your team is like the Niners teams of Harbaugh – where you have a fantastic running game and stellar defense – you can win a lot of games that way. When you’re the Redskins, you’re 5-3 in a bad division.
#12 Baltimore Ravens (4-5-0, +53, LW: 10)
#11 Minnesota Vikings (5-3-1, +17, LW: 13)
The Vikings set a franchise record on Sunday, recording 10 sacks against the Lions. In a division where even the records are mediocre they sit just a half game behind the Bears for first place in the NFC North. While Kirk Cousins has continued the modern day tradition of ripping teams off because of the position he plays, the Vikings defense has been above average. Their points for and points against are virtually even (221-204; more on this later). I don’t have high expectations for this team because like other teams, they address the wrong issues.
#10 Pittsburgh Steelers (5-2-1, +39, LW: 12)
#9 Seattle Seahawks (4-4-0, +32, LW: 6)
#8 Houston Texans (6-3-0, +32, LW: 11)
#7 Los Angeles Chargers (6-2-0, +40, LW: 8)
The Chargers could be one of those fun teams come playoff time. Their kicking game is terrible, which gets magnified come January. They seem like a lock for the playoffs at 6-2, and what a bad field the AFC is. Seriously, just keep everyone out of the playoffs except for KC and New England, let them play the AFC Championship game right now and spare us. Thankfully there are box scores so I don’t have to watch.
#6 Carolina Panthers (6-2-0, +40, LW: 7)
#5 New England Patriots (7-2-0, +68, LW: 5)
#4 New Orleans Saints (7-1-0, +61, LW: 3)
#3 Chicago Bears (5-3-0, +82, LW: 4)
#2 Kansas City Chiefs (8-1-0, +101, LW: 2)
#1 Los Angeles Rams (8-1-0, +99, LW: 1)
This week I decided to see what I was missing and actually sit around and watch some of this garbage. Here are my observations:
Nathan Peterman starting in the NFL is more than enough proof that there is collusion against Colin Kaepernick. Before today he was just a stat line to me. Today he became a punchline.
I wasn’t impressed with Carolina or San Diego. Then I found out that they’re both 6-2. Again, this league sucks.
The idiots who worship Aaron Rodgers simply have no idea that he doesn’t play defense or special teams.
Add in these stupid shovel passes as another reason I take QB stats with a grain of salt.
Jimmy Haslam bought a soccer team for a reason.
One of the biggest reasons for NASCAR’s popularity is that you never here: This week it’s the Jets and the Dolphins!!
The Cowboys haven’t won on the road all season. And with a win on Monday night they will be just a game out of first.
Replay is still horrible.
These are my opinions, you’re entitled to yours. Just make sure you exercise those on Tuesday and vote.